Goodbye 2012, Hello 2013!

We’re at the end of 2012 and there are Top Ten lists for everything (and I mean everything!).  I love those lists, although a list of “Top Ten Apologies” makes me pretty skeptical when Libyan President Mohamed el-Magariaf and Vice-President Biden are listed alongside Kristen Stewart of Twilight fame.

Really, Time.com?  I think you just made my list of “Top Ten Disappointing News Outlets.”

Anyway, I love almost all lists so had the “brilliant” idea to ask Robert what he enjoyed about 2012.  I thought it would be a fun way to create our own Top Ten list to end the year and get started on 2013.

Sometimes conversations with Robert are pretty, hmm, well, short.  He’s been known to surprise me, though so I didn’t know what to expect.   

I started by asking, “What did you like about 2012?”

Robert took a bite of his Rocky Road ice cream and said, “A lot of things.” (Even though he didn’t say it, I’m pretty sure “Rocky Road Ice Cream could be at the top of his list so we’ll count that as Number 1).

Um, like what?

“Watching movies.  There’s a lot of good movies at Day Program.” (There’s Number 2)

That’s nice.  What else did you like this year?

“It was excellent.  I had a good time.” (Nothing specific but good times definitely count as Number 3)

I reminded him he was in the hospital this year (thinking this would trigger gratitude for getting better).

“I had a good time there too.”  (Not the answer I expected but I have no doubt he did have a good time!  While I was worried sick as he battled pneumonia and sepsis, he was also getting plenty of sleep, eating in bed and being visited by nurses around the clock.  Let’s count “good times in the hospital and getting better” as Number 4)

Is there anything else good about 2012?

After scanning the family room, “My walker is good too.” (Number 5 – we’ll take it)

Is that pretty much it? 

“Yeah.”

He didn’t quite make it to ten but I can think of a few more to add to his/our Top Ten List of What Made 2012 Wonderful:

6.  2012 was the year of New Home getting a terrific new House Manager!  Robert may not realize how important this is but it has eased my mind tremendously having someone there with Robert’s best interests at heart.

7.  Robert’s adaptable clothing from Buck and Buck.  He now doesn’t have to worry about buttons on any of his shirts or pajamas and I’ve even switched him to Velcro closing jeans.  After I worried he wouldn’t like the switch to a Velcro close in his jeans, he now won’t wear any other kind!

8.  Robert and I were part of an interview for the AARP produced PBS program, Inside E Street.  Robert giggled when I told him people would be asking for his autograph once he was filmed and he loved every minute of it (even though he was sick at the time and ended up in the hospital the next day!). 

9. Robert was able to visit our grandmother for the first time in years and, although the visit was much shorter than anticipated, Robert’s happiness meter was off the charts. 

10.  Robert may not have been able to meet all of the amazing, new people and fellow advocates I’ve met by advocating for Epilepsy Awareness, but I’ve told him about everyone and he knows people read about him on the computer.  He always says, “That’s nice” when I tell him about it. 

Thank you for sharing 2012 with us!  I look forward to many more moments in 2013 that will make the Top Ten next December 31.  Robert will be doing what he loves: eating Rocky Road Ice Cream and seeing the “excellent” in everything.

Have a very Happy New Year filled with many moments to make you smile. 

The Spring Wardrobe

Robert and his Spring Wardrobe

The weather is warming up so Robert is finally ready to wear his short sleeve shirts and keep his coat in the closet (well, we’re still working on that – he really likes to wear his coat).  Robert is very particular about his shirts so I’m always on the lookout for shirts that are button down, have easy buttons to manipulate, have a front pocket on the left and are some shade of blue or solid white. 

Since buttons are getting more and more difficult to manage for Robert, I was thrilled to find Buck and Buck which I briefly wrote about a few months ago.  I was first told about this clothing company from a fellow caregiver who needed clothing that zipped up in the back so that her mom with severe dementia couldn’t wiggle her way out of clothes and her protective brief.

I’ve ordered long sleeve and short sleeve men’s shirts from Buck and Buck and have been extremely pleased with their products.  More importantly, Robert is pleased too and has even branched out to include a red shirt in his wardrobe!

Buck and Buck is based in Seattle and has a variety of clothing for the disabled and elderly.  They also don’t do any advertising.  How in the world do they stay in business without a marketing budget?  By word of mouth, a reliable product and the best customer service a person could ask for. 

The shirts Robert uses are closed with Velcro but have the buttons on the outside so the shirt looks like any other dress shirt.  It makes dressing that much quicker and easier for Robert and undressing is done even quicker.  In fact, when I first showed Robert how the Velcro shirts worked, he carefully watched me “button” the shirt with the Velcro and then laughed at me “ripping” the shirt open to “unbutton” it. 

The shirts are practical and amusing.

My most recent order for Robert’s short sleeve shirts was placed one recent evening but I received a call the next morning from the customer service representative.  Apparently, I ordered two different kinds of shirts and the rep politely asked me if I actually wanted to do that.  One shirt was meant to be worn completely buttoned up (which covers up the Velcro) and the other was to be worn slightly open at the collar without any Velcro showing.  Did I mean to order two different shirts?   Um, no and thanks for calling.  Obviously, this caregiver needs all the help she can get.

Talk about good service!

Because I don’t want to keep this company a secret and (selfishly) want them to be in business for a very long time, I’m passing the word about this caregiving friendly company.  Please pass along their website (www.buckandbuck.com) to anyone who may need special clothing for their loved one.  (And, no, they didn’t pay me for this post).

I’d love to hear about your experiences with this company.  If you know of any other caregiver friendly companies, please let me know so we can spread the word and keep these businesses thriving!

Caregiving Solutions: It's the Little Things

There are big challenges in caregiving.  Making sure your caree gets the right medications, fighting with insurance companies to get these medications or necessary medical procedures, completing disability paperwork (ugh!), or finding a suitable living facility for your loved one.

It’s great when help is available for these big challenges but I have a special love for those little things that make life a little easier (aside from the obvious, like coffee and our lovable pets).

A few years ago when Robert was in a Skilled Nursing Facility, the occupational therapist changed Robert’s regular shoelaces with shoelaces that never untie. 

Oh my god, I was so happy you’d think he handed me a basket full of Starbucks gift cards (I do like my coffee).

Robert loves plain black tennis shoes.  He’s worn the same brand and style for years and years (don’t worry, he gets new shoes every now and then but they are the same style and brand – hopefully, they never discontinue that style)!  These shoes lace up and Robert had increasing difficulty bending over and having the dexterity to tie the laces. Of course, they were always coming untied (you would think the job of shoelaces would be to stay tied). 

The occupational therapist came along and, without fanfare, changed the shoelaces to what I call “magic shoelaces.”  Woohoo!  Happy dance!  Robert gets to keep the style of the shoe he likes and doesn’t have to worry about tying and untying the shoes (or having someone else tie them for him). 

It was love at first sight for Robert too and he actually became irritated with a doctor at a recent neurology visit because the doctor untied these laces without a thought.  (We got them tied back up and Robert was happy once again while the doctor apologized for his mistake once he saw how important these were to Robert). 

Another recent find that has brought just as much thrill to us: button up shirts with Velcro.  I’ve written about Robert no longer being able to button one of his sleeves.  Robert’s preference is button down shirts (pulling a t-shirt over his head is an impossible task for him) but the buttons take quite a lot of concentration and it takes him a long while to dress.  I began to wonder if bigger buttons were going to be necessary meaning my worst fear would be realized:

I would have to learn to sew!

Thankfully, I found Buck and Buck Clothing Company based in Seattle (yes, that’s free advertising!).  They make all sorts of handy clothing for the disabled and elderly but the dress shirts for men caught my eye.  Buttons on the outside; Velcro on the inside!  Bonus: they come in Robert’s favorite colors – blue and white.

Robert tried on his first new shirt last weekend and, aside from not being able to see the white Velcro on a white shirt (an easy fix with a permanent marker), he loved them!  Dressing took much less time than normal and he was even able to button both his sleeves. 

Robert declared the shirt “excellent” and I ordered him four more. 

Finding help for the little things make tackling the big things so much easier, doesn't it?

Have you found anything that is so simple yet makes such a huge impact on your or your caree’s life?  Please share in the comment section below while I keep doing my happy dance!